Showing posts with label Personal. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Personal. Show all posts
1
This is my 100th post. I would have never believed that I would be foolish enough to spend such copious amounts of time on something that almost nobody reads. But foolishness is fun. Having your space without anybody there to censor you is unbelievable. I can call you a nigger, insinuate that your mother is a whore, brand our PM as an ass and pretend that I know more about economics than the Planning Commission; I am my God in this domain. And you can't do shit about it. It is for this freedom that this blog will survive.
Posting has been very slow on the blog because my net connection was down since a week. Why? Because a bunch of monkeys ripped off the cables. Twice. Seriously.
Woke up to see Papa getting ready to leave for Goa. He was supposed to attend a congregation of fathers from almost all the churches which are a part of the Jacobite Syrian Orthodox Church. Amen to that.
Mornings and lethargy are synonymous for me. I find it a chore to drag myself out of my bed. And so being incapable (by choice) of doing anything productive i was just walking around the house, occasionally giving the walls a meaningful stare. Then finally Papa was all set to leave. I asked him how he proposed to reach the railway station and he said that he would probably catch a bus. Cool I said and asked him if I should get a rick to take him to the bus stand. Mom was there and on hearing my suggestion, she crinkled her forehead, frowned and said, "Do you have any clue how long you will take if you go to fetch a rick?". Ouch. I may be slow but this was casting too great an aspersion on my ability to fetch a rick. But hey if they don't want it then why force it upon them?
Mummy and Papa started discussing how he was gonna reach the bus stand. After much deliberations over God knows what, they decided that he will catch a rick. Ahem, did anyone mention that earlier? I told dad that "Hey so what was it that i suggested earlier?" He had one of his nervous smiles ready, its not nervous actually its almost shy and ya he looks kinda cute with that smile on, you have to see it to get an idea what its like. Ya so where was I? Ya he gave one of those disarming smiles of his and just said' "Ya."
Dad and Grandpa eventually walked the whole distance. Much faster than the rick i could have called over of course.
Mornings and lethargy are synonymous for me. I find it a chore to drag myself out of my bed. And so being incapable (by choice) of doing anything productive i was just walking around the house, occasionally giving the walls a meaningful stare. Then finally Papa was all set to leave. I asked him how he proposed to reach the railway station and he said that he would probably catch a bus. Cool I said and asked him if I should get a rick to take him to the bus stand. Mom was there and on hearing my suggestion, she crinkled her forehead, frowned and said, "Do you have any clue how long you will take if you go to fetch a rick?". Ouch. I may be slow but this was casting too great an aspersion on my ability to fetch a rick. But hey if they don't want it then why force it upon them?
Mummy and Papa started discussing how he was gonna reach the bus stand. After much deliberations over God knows what, they decided that he will catch a rick. Ahem, did anyone mention that earlier? I told dad that "Hey so what was it that i suggested earlier?" He had one of his nervous smiles ready, its not nervous actually its almost shy and ya he looks kinda cute with that smile on, you have to see it to get an idea what its like. Ya so where was I? Ya he gave one of those disarming smiles of his and just said' "Ya."
Dad and Grandpa eventually walked the whole distance. Much faster than the rick i could have called over of course.
Recently Neha had the misfortune to step on a poor insect. It promptly showed her that trampling people without their permission is just not done. And it was one smart insect if you ask me: it chose to voice its protest not through its own feeble buzzing but through Neha's belligerent bellowing. It managed to bite/sting her in such a way that to this day we have not been able to find a single clue as to where exactly did it inflict the wound. Neha shows me a mark to prove that I am wrong.....
But to continue with our story, Neha showed why she was competing against the Niagara falls for the maximum quantity of water that can pass through any point in space in a given period of time. And her exemplary performance convinced me that Niagara was just not competition. She let some of that salty water fall on my hands and when she hit me - don't ask why, its a mystical ritual - ya so when she hit me, water actually splashed all over my face. Men fortunate/unfortunate enough not to have water fountains as sisters will never understand what happened but then thats a minority. If not a sister then a girlfriend can always fill in.
All this resulted in deep pain for me: I had to carry her around and this resulted in unbearable agony to my 17 year old - performing like a 70 year old - back.
Moral: Insects are bad. Bad for your sister and more importantly bad for your back.
But to continue with our story, Neha showed why she was competing against the Niagara falls for the maximum quantity of water that can pass through any point in space in a given period of time. And her exemplary performance convinced me that Niagara was just not competition. She let some of that salty water fall on my hands and when she hit me - don't ask why, its a mystical ritual - ya so when she hit me, water actually splashed all over my face. Men fortunate/unfortunate enough not to have water fountains as sisters will never understand what happened but then thats a minority. If not a sister then a girlfriend can always fill in.
All this resulted in deep pain for me: I had to carry her around and this resulted in unbearable agony to my 17 year old - performing like a 70 year old - back.
Moral: Insects are bad. Bad for your sister and more importantly bad for your back.
When you decide to be an entrepreneur and that too at the age of 17, forsaking conventional education you know the going is bound to be tough. Yes there is the importance that people atach to college degrees but thats another issue altogether. The thing that has been confusing me the most is their pressing me to take up a 'normal' job. And whats so wonderful about a normal job? And pat comes the reply: security.
Ah my -terror-, the only thing that can keep incompetents like Bush in office and makes people capable of rising above the ordinary sit at desks and slog away. I always find it funny why people allow a feeling as negative and as destructive as fear to dominate their day to day lives. Fear although an essential quantity in man is there to help us survive, it has nothing to do with living. Its essential for survival.
Truth is i can't find any sense in the argument that a job is safer than a business venture. With a job i am totally insecure about the extent to the level to which i can grow. My growth can be cut because I did not behave like i should with my boss. Tell me this: Does the fact that somebody else has power over you increase your insecurity or do you feel secure about it? As for me i am paranoid about anybody else governing my life.
Arre baba damn your freedom they say talk about financial freedom na? Financial security in a job? Are you kidding? Financial security when what every employer worth his salt wants to do is right size? Then in a job i can be cent percent sure that i will never get my dream car or my dream home while at least with my business i still stand a chance. There are no ceilings to block me. And why don't people realize that no matter how much they are paid, they are still only getting crumbs from the business owner's table? Only explanation seems to be that people are essentially dumb or scared. Either way rats will always be in the rat race, the best you can do is help yourself i guess.
Ah my -terror-, the only thing that can keep incompetents like Bush in office and makes people capable of rising above the ordinary sit at desks and slog away. I always find it funny why people allow a feeling as negative and as destructive as fear to dominate their day to day lives. Fear although an essential quantity in man is there to help us survive, it has nothing to do with living. Its essential for survival.
Truth is i can't find any sense in the argument that a job is safer than a business venture. With a job i am totally insecure about the extent to the level to which i can grow. My growth can be cut because I did not behave like i should with my boss. Tell me this: Does the fact that somebody else has power over you increase your insecurity or do you feel secure about it? As for me i am paranoid about anybody else governing my life.
Arre baba damn your freedom they say talk about financial freedom na? Financial security in a job? Are you kidding? Financial security when what every employer worth his salt wants to do is right size? Then in a job i can be cent percent sure that i will never get my dream car or my dream home while at least with my business i still stand a chance. There are no ceilings to block me. And why don't people realize that no matter how much they are paid, they are still only getting crumbs from the business owner's table? Only explanation seems to be that people are essentially dumb or scared. Either way rats will always be in the rat race, the best you can do is help yourself i guess.
One set of people who have worried me the most are hypocrites. And when you discover that you are one I can assure you that it is not exactly the most pleasant thing in the world. And who was I cheating? Myself. Now thats about the most difficult person to cheat and when you realize that you have managed it you know that it is one achievement that you rather wish you never had.
Well how did I cheat myself? Its a rather curious issue. I read the Fountainhead about a year ago and realized that among all the writers in the world Ayn Rand was about the only one to whose philosophy i could connect. Our ideas of man and life were almost the same and she expressed it much better than I have been able to communicate it to anybody and that list of 'anybodies' includes me too. But then something real strange happened: I started hating her by the end of that book. A revulsion that I could never understand.
That was true maybe till the last few months. I realized that what created that feeling of hatred was her portrayal of her anti-heroes and her style which implied that most of society was filled with parasites, cattle who found wisdom in following the herd. Maybe I was scared by that possibility but I realize that she may actually be right. People when forced with an uncomfortable choice do not decide to consult their reason to decide for themselves instead they decide what others have done which really is an excuse for deflecting responsibilty by doing the generally acceptable thing. My decision to be an entrepreneur without becoming a graduate was received with unbelievable vengance and fury. Not just from my parents but from friends too.
Nobody ever had any legitimate arguments to counter mine. All they eventually implied that I was immature because I dare to dream big, I did not understand what life was all about because I did not follow the herd and do what everybody else does too. I had not seen hardship, they said. Nobody studied for knowledge they implied, everybody did it for a scrap of paper. And that piece of paper they helped me understand was my future. They said three hours in a dreary examination hall had the power to decide my life.
Well it surely does I say; if I allow it to but I wont. My life will go the way I steer it. Maybe it will all crash down but at least I wont have anybody to blame.
Well how did I cheat myself? Its a rather curious issue. I read the Fountainhead about a year ago and realized that among all the writers in the world Ayn Rand was about the only one to whose philosophy i could connect. Our ideas of man and life were almost the same and she expressed it much better than I have been able to communicate it to anybody and that list of 'anybodies' includes me too. But then something real strange happened: I started hating her by the end of that book. A revulsion that I could never understand.
That was true maybe till the last few months. I realized that what created that feeling of hatred was her portrayal of her anti-heroes and her style which implied that most of society was filled with parasites, cattle who found wisdom in following the herd. Maybe I was scared by that possibility but I realize that she may actually be right. People when forced with an uncomfortable choice do not decide to consult their reason to decide for themselves instead they decide what others have done which really is an excuse for deflecting responsibilty by doing the generally acceptable thing. My decision to be an entrepreneur without becoming a graduate was received with unbelievable vengance and fury. Not just from my parents but from friends too.
Nobody ever had any legitimate arguments to counter mine. All they eventually implied that I was immature because I dare to dream big, I did not understand what life was all about because I did not follow the herd and do what everybody else does too. I had not seen hardship, they said. Nobody studied for knowledge they implied, everybody did it for a scrap of paper. And that piece of paper they helped me understand was my future. They said three hours in a dreary examination hall had the power to decide my life.
Well it surely does I say; if I allow it to but I wont. My life will go the way I steer it. Maybe it will all crash down but at least I wont have anybody to blame.
I have always wondered as to why when vegetarians had a word to describe themselves why should we people who are almost fully meat eaters but are condemned by our fate as humans to be omnivores not be given a name? Of course I had heard somebody suggest carnivore but that was supposed to be for animals who ate only meat. So I was glad to read here that when my friends said that I am vegetarian I could proudly state that I am a Carnist.
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