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When you decide to be an entrepreneur and that too at the age of 17, forsaking conventional education you know the going is bound to be tough. Yes there is the importance that people atach to college degrees but thats another issue altogether. The thing that has been confusing me the most is their pressing me to take up a 'normal' job. And whats so wonderful about a normal job? And pat comes the reply: security.

Ah my -terror-, the only thing that can keep incompetents like Bush in office and makes people capable of rising above the ordinary sit at desks and slog away. I always find it funny why people allow a feeling as negative and as destructive as fear to dominate their day to day lives. Fear although an essential quantity in man is there to help us survive, it has nothing to do with living. Its essential for survival.

Truth is i can't find any sense in the argument that a job is safer than a business venture. With a job i am totally insecure about the extent to the level to which i can grow. My growth can be cut because I did not behave like i should with my boss. Tell me this: Does the fact that somebody else has power over you increase your insecurity or do you feel secure about it? As for me i am paranoid about anybody else governing my life.

Arre baba damn your freedom they say talk about financial freedom na? Financial security in a job? Are you kidding? Financial security when what every employer worth his salt wants to do is right size? Then in a job i can be cent percent sure that i will never get my dream car or my dream home while at least with my business i still stand a chance. There are no ceilings to block me. And why don't people realize that no matter how much they are paid, they are still only getting crumbs from the business owner's table? Only explanation seems to be that people are essentially dumb or scared. Either way rats will always be in the rat race, the best you can do is help yourself i guess.
The Organiser apparently feels that the Sachar Committee's report - that showed the extent to which Muslims were under represented in various sectors - is all wrong. How did they come to that conclusion? Well its easy to come to any conclusion if you decide to leave your brains at home while writing an article. And thats precisely what the writer of this piece has done.

Lets go over his arguments:

The committee does not take into account the data from Kashmir, (hold on to your bellies) Pakistan and Bangladesh. Why you ask should data from Pakistan and Bangladesh be considered? Because according to the all knowing author, Muslims count them as one single entity across countries and their apparent backwardness in India should be seen against their prosperity in other countries with a Muslim majority. Now this is about as illogical as it gets. The question that we are facing is why is a particular religious community suffering from under representation in almost all sectors except jails. Its not about whether Muslims in any other country or even some state that are better off. Just because the Muslim is better off in some places, it is not an excuse to let him remain backward in others.

Top political posts in the country such as that of the President, Prime Minister and Army Chief are held by minorities. So what? The Sachar committee's report is not about Muslims occupying the top posts of the country but about their vast under representation in almost all sectors where a 'normal' man may work. Its very imperative for political parties to put in minorities at the top posts in the country as they have to project their 'secular' image. This concern does not extend to the common Muslim and consequently he suffers.

There is no substance in the argument that the Muslim is not under represented. The question is how we are going to address this inequity.
Michael Jordan having "retired," with $40 million in endorsements, makes $178,100 a day, working or not.

If he sleeps 7 hours a night, he makes $52,000 every night while visions of sugarplums dance in his head.

If he goes to see a movie, it'll cost him $7.00, but he'll make $18,550 while he's there.

If he decides to have a 5-minute egg, he'll make $618 while boiling it.

He makes $7,415/hr more than minimum wage.

He'll make $3,710 while watching each episode of Friends.

If he wanted to save up for a new Acura NSX ($90,000) it would take him a whole 12 hours.

If someone were to hand him his salary and endorsement money, they would have to do it at the rate of $2.00 every second.

He'll probably pay around $200 for a nice round of golf, but will be reimbursed $33,390 for that round.

Assuming he puts the federal maximum of 15% of his income into a tax deferred account (401k), his contributions will hit the federal cap of $9500 at 8:30 a.m. on January 1st.

If you were given a penny for every 10 dollars he made, you'd be living comfortably at $65,000 a year.

He'll make about $19.60 while watching the 100 meter dash in the Olympics, and about $15,600 during the Boston Marathon.

While the common person is spending about $20 for a meal in his trendy Chicago restaurant, he'll pull in about $5600.

This year, he'll make more than twice as much as all U.S. past presidents for all of their terms combined. Amazing isn't it?

If Jordan saves 100% of his income for the next 450 years, he'll still have less than Bill Gates has today.

$$$ Game over. Nerd wins.

Brilliant. Seen at Board Of Wisdom.
"I am Sunehri," says Aishwarya Rai,"the golden girl." (Or something to that affect.)

That pretty much sums up the movie for me. It is just the kind of dialogue that you never ever wanna hear. Time for a post mortem. I love dissections.

Hrithik Roshan: Well here is a reason you may want to see this movie. Looking as good as ever, he makes the shift from the nerd cum super hero in Krish to "duniya ka sabse cool chor" effortlessly. He is doing everything that was expected of him.

Bipasha Basu: I wonder if she is as clueless about her role as I am.

Aishwarya Rai: Sunehri the 'gai' (cow for all u people who cant get hindi, especially when its in English). Idiotic performance, stupid name, irritating except in a few scenes when she is drool worthy. Caution: If you are watching this movie for Ash then turn the volume to mute everytime she opens her mouth, or be doomed.

Abhishek Bachnan: Totally over shadowed by Hrithik though he plays the part of the brooding cop quite well.

Uday Chopra: Don't get me started.....

Plot: Invisible. Must've been using metamaterial.

Music: Stupid, idiotic score during action scenes. Title track is kinda OK but the less said about the rest of the songs the better.

Final Judgment: Take along a pack of your favourite pills for relieving head aches. They may come in handy.
Well every now and then the governments that rule us seem to forget that we live in a free country. They seem to be blissfully unaware of the fact that its for the individual to decide how to run his/her life.

A recent decision by the Andhra Pradesh government to makes it mandatory for couples to undergo an HIV test before getting married. On the surface this looks like a very good idea but it really is a most stupid one. Just because the government cannot educate people to make this choice for themselves they are forcing it upon them. 'So what?' you say, it will at least help to curb the spread of the disease. Oh yeah? Tell me how difficult it will be to get a forged certificate? As easy as pulling those crisp hundred rupee notes into eager hands.

Even the UN has opposed mandatory testing as this will only help corruption to spread its tentacles a bit wider. It certainly wont do anything for the checking the spread of the disease.

So whats the way out? Its education. I don't see any shortcuts. Its much more sane if the bride or groom demands for a test before marriage rather than the government trying to force the test on us.

I hate cheesy quotes like 'Prevention is better than cure' but its the only one I can think of now. Rather than trying to force people into doing something, its much better to educate them so that such autocratic laws will never be necessary.
A new product called the Pherlure Phermone Cologne promises that if you are among the lucky 75% you will experience an "increase in hugging, kissing, and sexual intercourse."

Curiosity First: How does this thing work? Well any chappie who has been following those numerous shows on sex on Discovery would know about this. Apparently it seems that people can smell some natural chemicals called phremones. Phremones are generated naturally by the human body. And by making women smell sweat from other women's underarms, (i know my blog is not kind on your tummy) some people have concluded that these Phremones are strong stuff. Strong enough to affect a woman's ovulation cycle. The products web page claims that women do not judge men on the basis of their looks (tell that to Brad Pitt) or their personality but on you guessed it a man's smell. They of course do not go around sniffing for these phremones but feel it as a gut feeling. I would love to hate this theory but it seems to explain why women are never able to clearly state what they want in a man.

Well after trying this out a few guys seem to have given their testimonials and they seem to be happy with all the attention they are getting. But of course it seems like fabricated stuff as more often than not the case is.

Like a good old neanderthal, i still believe that some good old chivalry can land you a woman. But you see, I am a neanderthal and this is for attracting human women.
Apparently the Motor Accidents Claims tribunal in India feels that the lives of humans are equal to the lives of humans. In this bizarre ruling, which was based on a complaint by an elephant rider (mahout) whose 35 year old elephant, Babli had died when a Jeep containing British tourists had rammed into it in 1988. The tribunal awarded the mahout $13,474 as compensation.

And if you are wondering why, the tribunal's answer is that it was at par with humans because it obeyed commands, performed tricks and was the main breadwinner for the family.

Ah, finally i know what it takes to be a human.

Story from Times Online.
“As further clarified in the section-by-section analysis included in this report, the conferees believe that there should be no ambiguity regarding the legal and policy consequences of any future Indian test of a nuclear explosive device. In that event, the president must terminate all export and re-export of US-origin nuclear materials, nuclear equipment, and sensitive nuclear technology to India. The conferees expect the president to make full and immediate use of US rights to demand the return of all nuclear-related items, materials, and sensitive nuclear technology that have been exported or re-exported to India if India were to test or detonate, or otherwise cause the test or detonation of, a nuclear explosive device for any reason, including such instances in which India describes its actions as being ‘for peaceful purpose.’
This statement in the Act will trouble almost anybody who reads it and rightly so. It seems like an all out attack on India's sovereignty. But what we fail to consider is the fact that even President Bush has gone on to state that most of the parts of the act are like suggestions more than rules. The sections that India is most worried about, may not be binding on us. But then there is the all to obvious question, but who is to stop any future President from stopping trade with our country if we test a Nuclear bomb? Well my answer is based on an assumption, but i feel that it is a fairly safe one. Once nuclear co operation starts between the two countries, we can expect many American companies working on nuclear energy to invest here. Any sanctions against India will them. But why just nuclear energy? Considering the pace at which India is growing, lots of American MNCs are gonna increase their investments in India. And in my opinion the powerful lobbies that these businesses control in Washington should stop the US from imposing sanctions. And on top of that all, we are emerging as the one of the most powerful countries in the world, to consider that we wont have any bargaining power with the US is childish in its extreme.
Before you think that your fears about the Blogosphere's sanity are confirmed and before you drag your mouse to the close button of your browser; take a second to go through this post. The first question that we need to ask ourselves is: what is it about Lalu that revolts us? Why is it so difficult to imagine that he could one day be our Prime Minister and even if we imagine it, why are the visions that accompany it so apocalyptic?

Largely it has to do with his performance in Bihar. His deliberate ploy to make sure that Bihar never developed. His plan to make sure that whatever happened, the caste divisions should survive. All this is reason enough to make him a subject for our nightmares when envisioning him as our PM. But what we need to understand in this context is that Lalu is not a man who is attached to a dogma. He is a shrewd politician who is smart enough to understand when an idea's life time has expired. He is smart enough to know that his policies which worked very well for him in Bihar will never work at an all India level. This is best exemplified by his role as the country's railway minister. He could very well have allowed it to languish and nobody would have been surprised but he did not do that, he brought back a certain feeling of optimism that yes maybe the Railways can still be saved. I personally perceive this as a step towards his often stated ambition of becoming the country's PM. If Lalu feels that development is the way to go, then its about the best thing that can happen.

There is a huge difference between some one like Manmohan Singh propagating the virtues of development as opposed to Lalu. Like it or not Lalu is one of the most powerful people on the Indian political scene. He is a mass leader and as the charisma to sell the idea to the people. For someone like Dr. Singh the only thing that earns him support from the people is the perception that he is an honest man, he doesn’t have the rustic appeal to connect with the masses. And at this juncture what we need is some one to convince the masses that development through free market policies is the best way forward and Lalu can fit into that role perfectly.

And if Lalu comes across as a supporter for privatization, globalization and a free market economy then it will help it to shed the elitist tag that hangs like an albatross across its neck.
We really need some people to stand up to politicians and take them on, especially among the beaureaucrats. So when the VC of Lucknow University announced that he was not interested in being a rubber stamp and was ready to take any action necessary to maintain law and order in the University even if it angered the political class I was really happy. The guy seems to have a sense of humour too. These are some of the quotes he gave:

He was born to a postmaster so he said that:
“Since my father lived with rubberstamps all his life, I knew its reality and perhaps that is the reason I refused to be a rubber stamp of the CM’’
And then this one:
“I know that Mulayam Singh Yadav is a very good administrator and he will not allow these criminals to be active in the city. He can reform them easily and channelise their energy somewhere else. Maybe in time, booth capturing.”
I saw this queer little report in the Indian Express about an elephant named Laden which was given that title because of his habit of trampling over humans. While the article was good, what really amused me was this comment by Padma Hazarika, AGP MLA:
“It’s a loner and is not afraid of fire or crackers. It is different in behaviour as, unlike other elephants, it also kills women and children.”
Yup unlike other elephants this monstrosity has no particular pity for women and children. As if an elephant cares about stuff like that. And why women and children? Why are they spared by other elephants? I demand a law for equality in the matter of sex and age for the number of people killed by elephants. Maybe we can have the quota system there too.
Nandan has been rather good for me. Apart from that poem he sent me this joke too. Rather funny I say.

UN conducted a survey . The question was : Would you please give your honest opinion about the shortage of food in the rest of the world? The survey was a major failure as
>People in africa never knew what food was
>In china they never knew what opinion was
> In europe they never knew what shortage was
>In pakistan they never knew what honesty was
>In iraq they never knew what please was
>In america they never knew what rest of the world means....
Received this poem through sms from Nandan Mankad. The message says that this poem was nominated for the best poem of the year 2005, it doesn't give details about who nominated it or what the specific award was. No clue about the author either, the message says that this is written by an African child, the veracity of the claim couldn't be confirmed. But award or no award, its still beautiful.

When I born, I black.
When I grow up, I black.
When I go in sun, I black.
When I scared, I black.
When I sick, I black.
& When I die, I still black.
& You white fella...
When you born, you pink.
When you grow up, you white.
When you go in sun, you red.
When you cold, you blue.
When you scared, you yellow.
When you sick, you green.
& When you die, you gray....
& You calling me coloured?
When riots broke out in Mumbai a very curious incident happenned with me. When I received the news that the city may soon go up in flames, (sorry for the drama) I called up a certain friend of mine and what she said is rather telling of the common perception of Muslims. She apparently did not know how the riots had broken out but she was quick enough to say that she was scared as she lived in a place that was just a short distance from Mumbra, which she (not so) affectionately called Pakistan 2. No prizes for guessing why. She said that this was because it was the only place that had a non-muslim population of just 3%. She went on to add that all plans for bombings were hatched up there.

This incident may well mean nothing at all; but as far as I am concerned her attitude pretty much sums up the general mistrust towards the Muslims as a community. It is in this context that the governments recent initiative aiming to bring in quotas for Muslims should be seen. When a large number of people already are scared of them, any actions by the government - that seems to give them an unfair advantage - will most likely invite a violent reaction.

But you may argue that nobody is going around burning SCs, STs and OBCs. After all they are recipients of quotas too. But that is missing the point. At worst these classes are perceived as inferior in certain corners of the country, never as a threat. And when the governmemnt plays vote bank politics like this, it is giving much needed fodder to the saffron parties. For a long time they have not had enough effigies to burn, it would do us no good to give them humans instead.
One set of people who have worried me the most are hypocrites. And when you discover that you are one I can assure you that it is not exactly the most pleasant thing in the world. And who was I cheating? Myself. Now thats about the most difficult person to cheat and when you realize that you have managed it you know that it is one achievement that you rather wish you never had.

Well how did I cheat myself? Its a rather curious issue. I read the Fountainhead about a year ago and realized that among all the writers in the world Ayn Rand was about the only one to whose philosophy i could connect. Our ideas of man and life were almost the same and she expressed it much better than I have been able to communicate it to anybody and that list of 'anybodies' includes me too. But then something real strange happened: I started hating her by the end of that book. A revulsion that I could never understand.

That was true maybe till the last few months. I realized that what created that feeling of hatred was her portrayal of her anti-heroes and her style which implied that most of society was filled with parasites, cattle who found wisdom in following the herd. Maybe I was scared by that possibility but I realize that she may actually be right. People when forced with an uncomfortable choice do not decide to consult their reason to decide for themselves instead they decide what others have done which really is an excuse for deflecting responsibilty by doing the generally acceptable thing. My decision to be an entrepreneur without becoming a graduate was received with unbelievable vengance and fury. Not just from my parents but from friends too.

Nobody ever had any legitimate arguments to counter mine. All they eventually implied that I was immature because I dare to dream big, I did not understand what life was all about because I did not follow the herd and do what everybody else does too. I had not seen hardship, they said. Nobody studied for knowledge they implied, everybody did it for a scrap of paper. And that piece of paper they helped me understand was my future. They said three hours in a dreary examination hall had the power to decide my life.

Well it surely does I say; if I allow it to but I wont. My life will go the way I steer it. Maybe it will all crash down but at least I wont have anybody to blame.
In todays newspaper I read that when Shahrukh was asked whether he was interested in being a politician he apparently replied that "I am too bloody good looking to be one." Now i dont want to comment on that coz i am afraid of all the tomatoes and belans that would be flung at me if i were to express my opinion.

What I wanted to point out was that a survey which was conducted yesterday by a leading newspaper concluded that about 65% said that good looks were impoprtant in politics. So obviously Shahrukh is not in touch with his fan base and the people he proposes to entertain. (wah wah they should give me a phd for my theories.)

But then you cant really blaim Shahrukh, the specimens that show up in the parliament are no advertisements of physical perfection. Hell, I am too lenient but its best that it stays that way.
I always thought that nothing very interesting happened with me. I have never been part of an international spy network, nobody was bored enough to think of murdering me nobody was even interested in swindling me.

Well at least fulfilled my last wish... I finally got an email from a certain MR. IBRAHIM WATA, BILL AND EXCHANGE MANAGER, BANK OF AFRICA (BOA). OUAGADOUGOU, BURKINA FASO. He apparently wanted my help in the transfer of 14.5 million dollars because the dude who had this money died in an air crash. The letter has some philosophical nuggets like:There is no doubt that trust conceptually is a conundrum which leadsitself to deferring interpretation, we have decided to contact you due to the urgency of this transaction.

Never seen a more obvious example of a Nigerian scam. The guy is bound to ask for money for some technicality or the other and once he has fleeced me as much as possible he would vanish. Sigh. Wish I had the money to join adventures like these.

P.S. There is actually a place called OUAGADOUGOU in Burkina Faso. Strange but true.

Here is the full text of the mail:


Alternative e-mail:mr_ibrahim_wata004@yahoo.fr

Dear Sir/Madam

I know that this letter may come to you as a surprise but due to the
of this transaction.First I must solicit your confidence in this
transaction, this is by virtue of it's nature as being utterly
and top secret. Though I know that a transaction of this magnitude will
any one apprehensive and worried, but I am assuring you that all will
well at the end of the day. There is no doubt that trust conceptually
is a
conundrum which leadsitself to deferring interpretation, we have
decided to
contact you due to the urgency of this transaction.

I am the manager of bill and exchange at the foreign remittance
of BANK OF AFRICA(BOA). I came to know you in my private search for a
reliable and reputable person to handle this Confidential Transaction,
involves thetransfer of a huge sum of money to a foreign account
maximum confidence.

I am writing to you, following the impressive information received
about you
from the chambers of commerce. I believed that you are capable and
to champion this business opportunity. In my department we discovered
abandoned sum of $14.5m US dollars (Fourteen million five hundred
thusand US
dollars). In an account that belongs to one of our foreign customer who
along with his entire family On August 23, 2000 through Gulf Air Flight
with Airbus A320 crashed off, killing all 143 people on board and you
view the site for more

Since we got information about his death, we have been expecting his
next of
kin to come over and claim his money because we cannot release it
somebody applies for it as next of kin or relation to the deceased as
indicated in our banking guidelines but unfortunately we learnt that
all his
supposed next of kin or relation died alongside with him at the plane
leaving nobody behind for the claim. It is therefore upon this
that I and other officials in my department now decided to make this
business proposal to you and release the money to you as the next of
kin or
relation to the deceased for safety and subsequent disbursement since
is coming for it and we don't want this money to go into the Bank
as unclaimed Bill.

The Banking law and guideline here stipulates that if such money
unclaimed after five years, the money will be transferred into the Bank
treasury as unclaimed fund. The request of foreigner as next of kin in
business is occasioned by the fact that the customer was a foreigner
and a
Burkinabe cannot stand as next of kin to a foreigner.

We agree that 35% of this money will be for you as foreign partner, in
respect to the provision of a foreign account, 5 % will be set aside
expenses incurred during the business and 60 % would be for me and my
colleagues. There after I and my colleagues will visit your country for
disbursement according to the percentages indicated.

Therefore to enable the immediate transfer of this fund to you as
you must apply first to the bank as relations or next of kin of the
indicating your bank name, your bank account number,your private
and fax number for easy and effective communication and location where
the money will be remitted.

Upon receipt of your reply, I will send to you by fax or email the text
the application. I will not fail to bring to your notice that this
transaction is hitch free and that you should not entertain any atom of
as all required arrangements have been made for the transfer.

You should contact me immediately as soon as you receive this letter.

Trusting to hear from you immediately.

Yours faithfully,

Bill and exchange manager,
In what will undoubtedly turn out to be a major blow to the Indian male's psyche, I saw this report on yahoo news that the Indian male may not be as well endowed as his western counterparts. The institute surveyed 1,400 men and measured their sizes down to the last millimeter. It goes on to say that 60% of the men in Mumbai had their penises atleast one inch shorter than their international counterparts and about 30% had tools two inches shorter.

This apparently resulted in a 20% failure rate with condoms of the usual size. I did not understand this at first as condoms are supposed to be rolled down, so where did the question of size arise? The answer seems to be that condoms do not fit well enough and tear due to slippage.
I dont know how Indian men will take to this story. I am resting happily in the knowledge that Indian men are responsible for making India the second most populous country in the world so much about our abilities and as some smart ass commented: "Its not the size that matters but what you do with it."

And yeah do I expect the political parties to take any action on this? Yes of course my friend, expect this report to be banned for "attacks on the pride of our nation." Sorry for the PJ.
Well the BJP is out of ideas again. Since the last couple of years or so the BJP was a highly uncertain party with no apparent agenda at all. OK OK it did have an agenda and that was to oppose all the policies of the government which the left did not. But thats not what you would call an agenda is it? Thats more like a habit. Their hopes that the disjointed UPA would fall apart on its own have not materialized either. So what does the BJP think tank do? Stir up the good old gaumutra that it was made on. Yes my friends Ram Janmabhoomi is back again doing what it has always done best: Make a lot of noise.

What happened really was this: Apparently as an anniversary celebration the detractors of the Sangh Parivar decided to adjourn both houses of parliament. Nobody expected the saffron parties to make a lot of noise about it but they were mistaken.

Most of our politicians are illiterate and thats because of a very good reason: they were standing on their benches when the teacher was teaching. Demonstrating that they have not forgotten their school days, they stood up on their benches and shouted
Jai Shri Ram, Hum mandir wahin banayenge and Ram naam se sharmate, Afzal ko gale lagate.

All very dramatic. The female members of the Shiv Sena also had saffron scarves around their necks. The guys from the BJP had even brought placards to the party.

The implications for all this are very serious. Although the BJP claims that :“We want it built through peace and dialogue.” I am not very certain about their steadfastness to truth as far as this issue is concerned. Hopefully the vibrant economy, the feel good factor and simple good old boredom saves this country from another 1992.
Indian politicians who exploit their freedom of speech to the maximum shovelling whatever crap they want to down our throats have absolutely no problems when it comes to taking away that freedom from others.

This story in the Indian Express apparently reports that there are fan clubs for gangsters on Orkut. There are eight fan clubs devoted to underworld don Dawood Ibrahim and one each dedicated to Chhota Rajan, Chhota Shakeel and Abu Salem on Orkut.com alone. Not a very healthy sign I understand but what is the reaction of the political class and the police? Start monitoring these communities. As if they had nothing better to do. They never cared about corruption or the loads of problems plaguing them but orkut par time pass karne ka mauka kaise chod sakte hain?
WARNING:If You Have Had Food Anytime Soon Then Please Do Not Read This Post

Let me clarify a few things upfront: I did not go and find this blog. I saw it at one of the forums on a warez site.

What is this blog all about then?
Well in the words of the guy who runs this djodaman,"This blog is dedicated to my feces - okay, my shit. I will post everyday, or whenever I happen to take a dump, the picture of it with some analysis of what I ate the day before, and together we'll try to analyze the color, texture and size. I hope you enjoy it... Or not."

Ahem that should tell you something. He actually takes pictures of all that and posts it. With full blown descriptions. The funniest part is that he actually has adsense on his blog. I wonder what kind of ads Google displays for a topic like that.

Somebody must ban people like these from eating food. If after doing all this you still want to visit that blog, click here. Dont tell me i did not warn you.